You have to reach back a lot further than you would think to get to the lever for reclining the seat. It helps if you get out of the car and look at them, then it will make sense.The one that your hand naturally falls to when you're sitting in the seat is just for raising it and lowering it. This is assuming you have the Recaro seats.
Welcome, it's a very fun car, and they are quite hard to find, so you should count yourself lucky.